Life extracts I feel like writing.

If I had a horse…

On my Facebook friends list I have some odd people. I get annoyed by people posting shit (similar to this blog post actually – yes I am a hypocrite) and just either hide them from my feed or delete them off my list if it’s that retarded. Anyway, some people who annoy me don’t get hidden because they occasionally post things that interest me (read as: pictures of hot friends)…

One such person who falls into this category is a proper moany girl who hasn’t stopped whining since she finished university and actually had to enter the real world of work. This person has moved back into home, and by the sound of it sponges a fair bit, is rather spoilt, and yet has the cheek to moan about “the hotel service” and such-like. It may be tongue-in-cheek or whatever but it still seems pretty annoying.

So yeah, this person goes on about horses a lot – because that’s what girls who are spoilt and actually got that pony when they were younger actually turn into; true fact. Sometimes I go to post a reply to some of these silly status’ and just bite my lip, there are some things where I feel the need to point out others’ mistakes (such as the story behind this) but I manage to refrain more often than not.

Anyway, this person got me thinking this afternoon, if I had a horse, I’d definitely not give it a shit name like her and her stuck-up friends have, I’d go with a pretty standard name like Trevor.

Trevor would be a working horse, like a Police horse, I’d train it to kick the shit out of angry mobs and use it a little like bull-bars on a Land Rover to just get to the front of Post Office queues and useful things like that.

Anyone who called Trevor, ‘Trev’, would first be thrown back into their suped up shitty box car and then trampled, as per the aforementioned training for angry mobs. I would consider this to be a public service and demand money from the tax payer for doing this. It seems like quite a fair deal to me.

That is all.Source:


One response

  1. Nick Holmes-Siedle

    Trevor the attack horse, definitely a twist on the pony club! you could canter down snake and trample yourself a millenium podium. (subject for a short story??)

    18 September 2012 at 6:15 PM

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